The Lighter Side

I successfully had my explant last Wednesday. I had my implants removed en bloc only—no lift and no fat transfer.

According to the doctor, the implants were rock hard with thick capsules, which made en bloc very easy. There was quite a bit of calcification due to my body rejecting them, so as he was removing the capsule of scar tissue, the left implant ruptured. He also said that the implants themselves were very thin, so removing capsules from the implants was difficult.

I was finally able to get my drains removed on Monday morning, so I’m feeling more human and less like a science experiment. Still quite a bit of pain, but the doctor said that the capsules were affecting my muscles so they will be pretty sore for a while.

I’m getting around a little bit better and very thankful for my loyal caretaker. Jay Shuffler has been a godsend during this whole thing. Between continually rushing in to help me use the restroom, helping me measure that disgusting drain fluid (which is a big ask for someone who doesn’t do gross well), and making me healthy meal after meal, he has also been so encouraging as he sees changes that I just can’t see myself. He says I seem lighter, that my face appears brighter, how nice my figure looks, and that my mood has lifted even when I’m in pain. It’s not just that he sees these things, but that when I ask him how he’s doing, these are his replies adding how happy that makes him. I feel so lucky to have him and am so thankful for all that he has done for me…even if I don’t Instagram my dinner trays (according to him).

As for improvements, I have already experienced the loss of all the pain in my hands. This is not due to pain meds, because I’m not taking anything other than Aleve. And if Aleve actually helped my hands, I wouldn’t have spent thousands on RA tests. I also wake up in the morning actually feeling like I slept, which I haven’t felt in years. I thought I would feel lighter or like I could take a deep breath, but if I’m being honest, that just isn’t the case. I imagine that it’s because I still feel like I got hit by a car, so this will come eventually. These may seem like small improvements, but to me—they mean everything.